I've been struggling with this because
I don't want to look back
looking back takes me away
from what I want to do
which is to move forward
move forward
(conscious of small gains)
sometimes the past is too deep
to fathom
or at least our personal ones
history of course and black holes and everything
in between
that's something else

the ocean is calling at my window
I ignore it
but yesterday while I was ignoring it
it drew a silver line
so that I could see the difference
between it and the sky
and at least know what I was ignoring
and then it made a circle of a light
(because I still looked away)
look here
and don't think about anything else
just these two things
the line
and the circle of light
It will be god for you
(I meant to say good)

Struggling to stay in the present
and resist
I was trying to listen to a song about
when the sky claimed my attention
usually songs about dreaming are terrible
but because two lines about dreaming coincided with
the sea's 
I was compelled into some kind of
unavoidable memory
something trying 
to be noticed

I've been struggling to stay in the present
and Michel asks me to go back
to the time when we were laughing so hard
and being so silly
and outrageous
I can tell you about five dozen times
oh probably much more
just falling all over ourselves with
and then working our behinds off
of course
and making such beautiful music
about ladies in love
with white gloves
and angels of love
and ships that sail away
to fantasy places
(where yes 
the sea is 

all the time having such a good time
I never laughed so hard
I never was so touched
I never heard such songs
such singers
such beautiful
I never saw anyone so elegant
so smart
ok, so French
so silly
and outrageous
I never had such a good time
I never had such a good friend
I never
a good 

Kathleen Wakefield

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